How to Date Your Wife (and Make Her Fall for You Again)

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The concept of dating your wife may sound strange, but it has the power to keep the spark alive in your marriage and bring you closer together.

We’re going to provide you with some very valuable instructions on how to date your wife, romantic date ideas, and how to keep your wife happy with you for the long haul.

  • Be spontaneous and flirty with your wife, just like when you were dating.
  • Focus on understanding your wife’s needs, nurturing your relationship, and creating opportunities for connection.
  • Explore new romantic ideas to keep the spark alive in your marriage.
  • Be sure to know your wife’s love language and speak it fluently.
  • Make physical touch and cuddling a priority.

If you’re worried about your marriage becoming a statistic in the approximate 50% divorce rate in the U.S., do something about it now.

Start learning how to approach your wife in a way that lowers her defenses and allows her to respond to you differently with the techniques in Dr. Lee Baucom’s best-selling Save The Marriage Program.

Click the link above now, or keep reading for our guide on reigniting the spark in your marriage by dating again.

What Does Date Your Wife Mean?

Husband-wife relationships do not have to be stale and unromantic.

In fact, they shouldn’t be.

But married couples often treat their marriages very differently from dating relationships, in some ways to detrimental effect—like forgetting to prioritize love and excitement.

Dating your wife means taking the time to intentionally and passionately pursue her, just as you did when you first met her.

This involves setting aside special moments to connect, communicate, and create lasting memories together.

By focusing on her needs and desires, you’re reaffirming the bond you share and demonstrating your commitment to the relationship.

So take a look at your dating habits as a couple and make it your goal to rekindle those same feelings that brought you together in the first place.

Read Next: How to Be More Attractive to My Wife

How to Date Your Wife

If you’re wondering how to date your wife, here’s a guide to help you get the details right and make your wife feel special.

Plan Regular Date Nights

Don’t let weeks turn into months passing by without a date.

If you can, schedule a weekly date night to spend quality time together and focus on each other.

Note: These dates do not have to be expensive or fancy!

A husband’s primary goal is to simply show love and appreciation. It could be as simple as cooking a romantic dinner or going to the movies.

Keep in mind, creativity is key—don’t hesitate to dress up to make the night even more special.

Understand Her Love Language

Every individual has a primary love language that dictates how they give and receive love.

If you want to know how to date your wife, you have to take the time to learn her love language and put it into practice.

For example, if her love language is words of affirmation, writing her heartfelt love letters or love notes will be especially meaningful.

If it’s acts of service, express your love by taking care of her needs or the household chores.

Speak her love language, and you’ll be much more successful at reigniting the spark in your marriage.

Explore Shared Hobbies and Interests

Couples who experience new hobbies and interests together tend to stay connected and feel happier in their relationship.

So, make a list of shared activities that both you and your wife enjoy for date ideas.

It could be something like dancing, hiking, or attending a cooking class together.

Don’t forget to also try out new hobbies that you have always been interested in, like dancing lessons to keep things fresh and exciting.

Make Time for Intimate Moments

Physical intimacy is essential for maintaining a healthy, loving relationship.

Ensure you make time for intimate moments with your wife, such as cuddling, stargazing, or simply enjoying a warm conversation.

Remember that not all intimate moments need to lead to anything sexual per se – it’s enough that you’re giving each other undivided attention and affection.

Surprise Gestures and Thoughtfulness

When you were first dating before you got married, you probably tried to surprise your wife with thoughtful gestures to make her feel loved and appreciated.

Why stop now?

It could be as simple as sending her flowers when she least expects it, preparing breakfast in bed, or leaving her a sweet note in her lunchbox.

Also, compliment her genuinely and express your gratitude for the little things she does.

Be attentive to her needs and preferences to show her that you pay attention and value her happiness.

If you want to know how to really make her feel heard and seen, we highly recommend changing how you talk to and treat your wife with the tips in Dr. Lee Baucom’s guide Save The Marriage.

Maintain Physical Touch

Physical touch plays a crucial role in maintaining a connection and keeping the romance alive.

You don’t need to plan a whole honeymoon to keep the sparks flying.

Prioritize physical touch by holding her hand, giving her a massage, or spontaneous hugs and kisses.

Sexy gestures or playful touches go a long way in fostering intimacy and reminding your wife that you find her irresistible.

Plan Special Getaways and Vacations

Spontaneity can add excitement to your relationship, so surprise your spouse occasionally by planning special getaways or vacations.

Remember to tailor these experiences according to both of your interests and preferences.

By investing time and resources into these adventures, you demonstrate your desire to create precious memories that you can cherish for years to come.

Date Your Wife Ideas

Need married couples’ date ideas to keep your wife intrigued?

Here are some date night and day date ideas to help you reconnect and create lasting memories with your spouse.

At-Home Date Ideas

  • Cook dinner at home and surprise her with her favorite dish.
  • Take turns reading passages from your favorite books to each other over a cozy fire. Alternatively, you could draw each other instead.
  • Challenge each other to a board game or trivia night at home.
  • Watch a movie marathon featuring your wife’s favorite genre or actor.
  • Write love letters to each other. Then exchange them on a special date night.
  • Go to the grocery store together and set a timer for you and your wife to go separate ways and gather ingredients for a dessert fest at home. You can try doing themed dessert nights, like fruit or chocolate desserts, and whoever has the best ones wins an end-of-night full-body massage.
  • Dance with your wife in your living room.

Date Night Out Ideas

  • Revisit the place you fell in love, or recreate your first date. Spend time reminiscing about the early days of your courtship, recalling the excitement and butterflies you experienced back then. 
  • Go to a theater or live music performance that your wife loves.
  • Get to a local karaoke bar when you want a fun, free-spirited date night out.
  • Go to a bowling alley for a date night.
  • Take advantage of the seasons. If it’s cold and icy outside, go ice skating. If it’s hot and humid, have dinner at a beach or lakeside restaurant and then go for a stroll.
  • If you like comedy, head to a comedy club after a dinner date out and share some laughs with your wife.

Day Date Ideas

  • Go for a scenic hike or nature walk together.
  • Visit a local museum or art gallery and discuss your favorite pieces.
  • Pack a picnic lunch and head to a nearby park or beach for some quality time outdoors.
  • Go for a bike ride or rent a tandem bicycle to explore your local area together.
  • Go wine tasting at a vineyard or a local winery.
  • Try going to a carnival or fair for a dose of fun and excitement.
  • Get on a ferry and explore a little island you’ve never been to.

Vacation Date Ideas

  • Plan a weekend getaway to a romantic destination.
  • Unwind with a relaxing couples massage or spa day.
  • If all you have is a day, plan a short trip somewhere not too far away and treat it like a real vacation, full of sight-seeing and relaxation.
  • Plan your next big vacation around romantic excursions, like soaking in hot springs or bathing together under a waterfall.
  • Treat your hometown like a vacation spot and act like tourists for the day. Make sure to visit the places you would normally deem “touristy” and snap lots of selfies together.

Novelty and Adventure Date Ideas

  • Take a new hobby class, like painting or cooking, to enjoy a shared experience.
  • Try out a new workout class or fitness activity together.
  • Share a romantic stargazing session with a blanket and a telescope.
  • Volunteer for a local charity or non-profit organization together.
  • Plan a surprise date night where your wife doesn’t know the destination or activity until you arrive.
  • Have a themed dinner night at home, complete with costumes and decorations.
  • Sign up for a dance class to learn some new moves and have fun together.
  • Host a game night with other couples to promote friendly competition and bonding.

How Do I Start Flirting with My Wife?

Flirting with your wife again can bring back the sparks and excitement that might be missing from your relationship. 

It’s never too late to start flirting with your partner, so let’s look at a few simple tips to help you reconnect with your wife on a more playful level.

  • First, pay attention to your body language. Open up your posture and maintain eye contact when talking with your wife. This shows her that you’re engaged and interested in what she’s saying. Don’t forget to smile at her; it’s a simple yet powerful way to express your affection and create a more inviting atmosphere.
  • Next, compliment her genuinely and publicly. Everybody likes to hear that they’re the center of someone’s world. Giving your wife a heartfelt compliment in front of others is a powerful way to make her feel special. You can talk about her talents or express your appreciation for how amazing she was in a particular situation.
  • Another great way to flirt with your wife is by using subtle physical touch during conversation. You can caress her hair, hold her hand, or give her a gentle nudge on the arm when you’re talking. Slow dancing together in the living room, even without music, is a romantic idea that can lead to more flirtatious interactions.
  • Be playful. Remember, flirting should be fun and light-hearted; don’t take it too seriously. 
  • Do check your wife out. Let her catch you doing it. This can make her feel attractive and wanted, and lead the way to a flirtier type of dynamic between you.
  • Finally, dress up for her and put on her favorite outfit. This will not only boost your own confidence but will also make her feel appreciated as she notices the effort you’ve put into looking good for her.

How Do I Spark Intimacy with My Wife?

To spark intimacy with your wife, you need a few different strategies:

  • Let tension build. If you want to build chemistry and sexual intimacy with your wife, try not to bombard her with sexual advances so much as allowing the tension to grow between you, which is fun and exhilarating.
  • Ask your wife what her personal desires are between the sheets. You may learn something new about her desires and help create a more open dialogue that encourages a more satisfying relationship for you both.
  • Engage in meaningful conversations to strengthen emotional bonds. Ask her about her day, listen attentively, and share your thoughts and experiences. 
  • Physical touch is also vital for fostering intimacy. Double the time you spend engaged in hugs, sensual caresses, and kisses. Doing this regularly can create a deeper emotional connection.
  • Laughter is another way to bond, so make her laugh often. Share funny stories, watch comedies together, or even playfully tease each other. A good sense of humor can work wonders in your relationship.
  • Encourage your wife’s passions and interests, and be genuinely supportive of her goals and aspirations. Showing her that you believe in her abilities will create a stronger emotional bond between you.

How to Be Romantic to Your Wife

Being romantic to your wife is an essential aspect of maintaining a healthy and thriving marriage. 

Here are a few easy and practical ways for you to be romantic with your wife.

  • Write your wife a book of little love notes that she can fit in her purse and carry around with her. Include in it the things you love about her and moments when she makes you fall more deeply in love with her.
  • Send her flowers at work. Include some specialty chocolates or a small gift that she can enjoy while on a break and think of you.
  • Do thoughtful little things for her. Doing things like picking up her dry cleaning and deep-cleaning the bathroom might not seem romantic to you, but it certainly can be especially if your wife’s love language is acts of service.
  • Fuel the romance by calling her in the middle of her day just to say “I love you.” The gesture doesn’t have to be grand – a simple phone call to remind her that she’s always on your mind will go a long way in making her feel cherished.
  • Don’t forget the importance of going out together. Plan a romantic dinner for the two of you or even a weekend getaway. Hold hands, make eye contact, and intentionally invest in reconnecting and rekindling the romance.
  • Finally, don’t underestimate the power of physical affection. Hug her when she comes home from work, hold her hand while watching TV, and give her a gentle kiss when you both wake up in the morning or before going to bed.

These simple yet meaningful actions will help you maintain the passion and intimacy between you and your wife, ensuring a lasting and fulfilling marriage.

Reinforcing Your Relationship

When it comes to dating your wife and keeping the romance alive, laying a solid foundation is essential.

Follow these tips below to help you keep the momentum going and set the stage for a thriving, loving marriage that will continue to grow as you continue to date your wife.

Prioritize Communication

As a loving and supportive spouse, it’s important that you always prioritize communication in your marriage.

Actively listen to her thoughts and feelings, and express your own clearly and kindly.


  • Setting aside time for regular conversations
  • Asking open-ended questions to encourage deeper discussions
  • Demonstrating empathy and understanding through nonverbal cues, such as nodding and maintaining eye contact

Don’t Let Your Wife Doubt Your Commitment

Being married and showing your commitment to the relationship are two different things.

Marriage is a partnership, and both you and your wife must work together to make it successful.

Show your dedication by:

  • Supporting each other’s goals and dreams
  • Being present and engaged in both good times and tough situations
  • Establishing trust and loyalty in all aspects of your relationship

Emotional Connection and Friendship

Building and maintaining a strong emotional connection and friendship with your wife helps create a long-lasting and fulfilling marriage.

Treat each other as best friends, confidants, and partners in life by:

  • Sharing hobbies, interests, and new experiences together
  • Creating a judgment-free space for open and honest conversations
  • Laughing together and finding joy in each other’s company

Love and Respect

Finally, love and respect are the cornerstones of a solid foundation for dating your wife.

Show your love by being affectionate and giving her regular attention.

Respect her by valuing her opinions, acknowledging her feelings, and showing consideration for her needs.

Some ways to demonstrate love and respect include:

  • Complimenting and appreciating your wife’s qualities and efforts
  • Resolving conflicts in a fair and understanding manner
  • Supporting her personal growth and endeavors

Dr. Lee Baucom gives very concrete suggestions on how to turn your marriage around if it’s suffering in his guide Save The Marriage.

This is a truly valuable book for those who either have a partner who doesn’t care to work on the relationship, or for those who’ve tried couples counseling and it failed them.

Click here to check it out.

Marlene Davis is an experienced blogger with a focus on interpersonal relationships. Her dream is to help improve people's lives and relationships through sharing of practical knowledge and evidence-based practices.